The question is so huge. It cannot be answered in the one glib little sentence I felt was expected of me, the proud new mommy. However, who was I to be a Debbie Downer? I wasn't going to rattle off about the impossibly huge weight of responsibility that having a child creates. I also wasn't going to tell her that I couldn't believe how long the days and nights felt with a newborn, and how isolating it could be. I also didn't go into detail about what it feels like to nurse a baby around the clock when you have never done it before, and what it was like to do all of this while struggling to recover from childbirth (surgery in my case, but either way, recovery is hard).
We rarely tell anyone the surprising challenges of new Motherhood before they have children, especially pregnant women. Who wants to be the killyjoy who bursts the expecting mom's dreamy bubble? Or the ungrateful mommy complaining to the woman next to her struggling with infertility?So, for better or worse, we don't talk about the hard stuff.
Countless things are surprising when you have children. I'm pretty sure the surprises will ever end. My son is now 4, and my daughter just turned 2. Every single day is filled with surprises-- both welcome and not so much. It is of course the welcome ones that we hope to remember, but in trying to spare the feelings of others, are we actually doing a disservice to women everywhere-- should we really not [openly] discuss the mixed bag of Motherhood?
So, now I'll ask you: What has surprised you about Motherhood [so far]?
~Julia @ Frantic Mama
Clash of the Couples, an anthology I'm in, comes out November 3rd. Like the Facebook page!